Ups and Downs

What a a week it was. I got handed a cash bonus and got called out on by name as being a terrible manager. That’s the norm these days in my work life. It’s a constant yo-yo of ups and downs.

I’m frustrated by the lack of quality support my team gets. Then on the most irritating of all days, the people that I’m most frustrated with who regularly ignore my requests and suggestions, go and hand me some money in “appreciation for my hard work”. If my work was appreciated you’d listen to some of the things I’m asking you to do and actually do them. And frankly, if you want to do something for me just stop hiring escaped mental patients. That is the only way I can describe them – they are straight out of the Cuckoo’s Nest and I think they might be contagious because I feel like I am losing my mind. Their behavior is so bizarre and unprofessional and no one seems to see it or at least no one does anything about it. Most days I feel like Tyler Durden – which version I’m not even sure.

So then I go about my business trying to forget about the bonus that feels more like a bribe and a colleague stops me to say “Hey I read about you on Haha – must have been that lady you just fired!”  Hilarious.  If you don’t know what GlassDoor is, it’s a website where employees can anonymously review the company they work for. Their guidelines include “We encourage a healthy and constructive discussion about the workplace. We don’t accept reviews that include malicious personal attacks (by name, title, or association).” They also say that they review each review before it gets posted. Well they must also have a top notch staff since a person’s name, namely mine, made it to the website. If it was a genuine review by someone who had even a modicum of self awareness I wouldn’t have minded. I appreciate feedback both negative and positive. How else would I know how I’m doing? I just prefer the feedback come from someone who isn’t angry about being fired for just reasons which, by the way, were well documented by the mediator monitoring the situation for 3 months to ensure that it was in fact a justified termination situation. So after sending a pleasant email noting my lack of appreciation for being slandered and questioning their stated policies, the review mysteriously disappeared without even an auto-reply “Thanks for your feedback” email. Typical.

So that was my week. A mix of ups and downs, praise and hatred. Now here I am on Sunday night wondering already what my week will bring and hoping only for some stability.

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