Potential

I am inherently lazy.  Not the kind of lazy that I wear my pajamas all day and when I need to leave the house I convince myself that they look enough like clothes that I don’t have to get dressed, but rather that kind if lazy that keeps me from doing anything to the best of my ability.  I just get by.  I always have.  I wasn’t an A student but rather got Bs with a C or 2 mixed in.  It’s not that I wasn’t capable I just didn’t try.  I didn’t do my home work and didn’t study for tests.  I got by.  I went to college and even graduate school and even there, I got by.  I now have a good job where I make enough money to get by.  I do a fine enough job but I don’t excel.  I don’t even try to excel.

It is oh so tempting to stay here in this way of life because it is easy.  I think sometimes that this life should be enough, but it isn’t.  I have other aspirations, aspirations that require concerted effort and time, aspirations to become something else.  I know I am capable of achieving these goals yet I have not for no other reason than the fact that I am lazy.  Even this daily-ish blog, is a task on the path toward my goal, but as noted it is daily-ish not daily.  Why?  Because I just haven’t written it every day.  The only thing preventing me from achieving my goals is myself.  Why can’t I get out of my own way?    How many other people have this problem with their potential sitting fallow?  How many poets, inventors and artists are out there untapped because they are seduced by the ease of their day to day mundane existence?  How long can I pretend this is enough?

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